Forgiving a Sinning Brother

Recently, I have been talking with a brother who is involved in ongoing sin, and his problem is severe. It is the kind of problem that could easily trash his life and destroy his family. I read an article the other day about the doctrine of "Eternal Security", and the author said that if a person who once saved, should turn their back on Christ and throw themselves into a life of sin, that that person would not lose his or her salvation. The author wrote that such a person would lose some heavenly rewards, but would still go to heaven. I was kind of surprised to read that, because the argument usually is, "That person was never truly saved in the first place. He was obviously a false convert."

I have never agreed with that thinking, and though I have heard compelling arguments from learned Biblical scholars, I have never been able to see where it is truly backed up with Scripture. Besides, why is it that one moment the thinking is: "We can't know another man's heart. Only God knows a man's heart." and the next moment one can say, "He was not truly saved."?

19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, 20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, 21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God. Galatians 5:19-21

In the passage above, Paul wrote about practiced behaviors that demonstrate a sin lifestyle. He said that those who practice, meaning habitually live these works, would not inherit the kingdom of God. He did not say, "they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God--except those who have already been saved."

I agree that only God truly knows the full contents of one's heart. That doesn't mean though, that we can't necessarily know the general state of a man's heart as related to his salvation. God gives us the ability to discern, and the general state of a person's heart is often revealed to us by God in different ways. Sometimes, people simply up and tell us. "I don't believe in your God." But if a person is living a lifestyle that is devoted to sin, like the ones Paul wrote of, they will not go to heaven. That is what the Bible is saying. A man cannot serve two masters. A man must either serve God, or he is a slave to sin.

But what of the believing person you know who is falling ever-deeper into sin, so much so that it looks for all the world like an unbeliever living a sin lifestyle? We may believe in our judgment that such a person may have turned away from God and rejected His salvation, but that knowledge and decision is up to God alone. Where does that leave us in dealing with people when they are not repentant of their sinful behavior?

There are a couple of different things going on here that the Scriptures can shed some light on. First, we are bound to always be generally forgiving in our spiritual nature to never allow bitterness to gain a foothold in our lives. We should never "hold a grudge." If we do, how would we be able to extend our hearts in love to help another person heal, to help them in Christ to be triumphant over a sin-dominated lifestyle? On the other hand, we are also soft and foolish to ignore the persistent and unrepentant stubbornness of a rebellious believer. We are also bound by love to rebuke (in love) that person, and if he or she is unwilling to deal with their sin and repent and confess it to God, we are responsible to refuse to fellowship with them in a typically intimate fashion. Paul instructed the Corinthian church goers to do just that in 1st Corinthians five. That may sound harsh, but love isn't always easy. The failure to recognize and turn from sin and confess it to God is a serious indication of a rebellious heart. It can lead to deadly eternal consequences to one's self, and to real problems for others and for the church.

It isn't the goal to be vengeful or hurtful. The goal by doing this is to restore and to heal. The idea is to get the sinning person to turn away from the sinful path that may lead them away from God, and to get right with the Lord. We want that person to rid themselves of the sin "wall" he or she has built between themselves and God so that they can allow Him to work freely in their hearts to grow and change them.

"Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted." Galatians 6:1